"If I just breathe
Let it fill the space between
I'll know everything is alright
Breathe
Every little piece of me
You'll see
Everything is alright
If I just breathe"

i guess blastin the speakers wit loud music did gd job. somehow my anger was either taken away or calmed down by the head banging beats and the vibrations that the tiny yet oh so powerful speakers produced. was listenin to stuff by three days grace, rage against the machine, limp bizkit, 3rd strike, korn, P.O.D. and so many other real hard stuff.

lucky i handled the day properly. i couldve taken it out on somebody for sure, i was that pissed.

but at the end of the day, everyone has a reason to behave the way they do.

for my dad, i realised he had every reason to lash out on me. had i applied on ED to Carnegie Mellon, it would have meant that he would have to file his federal tax income papers in early. and thats one hell of a job. compared to me filling up 16 college applications, that work is tons more. furthermore, fillin up ur federal tax income papers is so complex and requires months to fill it up. u make any mistake, n u could end up in a trial, even jail. so rushing that kinda thing, yea, i guess i understood his frustration. so i juz let myself forget about the day's incident. nothing to worry about.

after thinking about it, yea, had i been accepted in CM, then it would hav meant high tuition fee, considerable competition, and missin out on prospects of goin to other unis. besides, theres nothin to lose, i can apply on regular anyway. jeez, y was i so worried about. stupid me. gettin so worked over one thing.

oh i got my SAT II results already. got 760 for maths IIC, 670 for physics and 590 for writing. im surprised i scored so high for maths, considerin i only did like 60-70% of the qtns. well, i remember from my practice bk tt in some yrs, they did award 700 for 30 correct ans out of 50 and 800 for gettin 40 out of 50. so i guess i was somewhere in between. im extremely happy for maths. physics was disappointment. i expected to do better. but physics was my last paper after two hours of other tests and it was juz all confusing questions tt u never see in a level kind of qtns. 670 isnt bad, but when i found out tt 670 was like 56 percentile, i was shocked. tt means quite a lot got 760 to 800. i wished i could b one of em. ah well. writin, well cant say anythin.

tts tt then. SAT I n II cleared. two college application complete, only essays to worry about for those two, and im very close to finishing FAFSA. tt leaves me to handle 12 more applications to fill up, all after A's. phew. tts a lot of job done for the day.

alrite, im juz gonna forget bt universities for once n go all out on chem n phy finally tomorrow. junli's gonna help me learn food chem n ill do the rest of chem n phy for myself. man, i wasted two days worth of study coz of all these university shit. i could hav so used the two days to finish physics and dedicate the next few days totally to chem.