k i hav to head somewhere really soon so gotta make it quick.

i hav been thinkin real hard bt the whole uni dilemma for the past few nights. n ive pretty much made up my mind.

i dont really understand y i was so bothered about. i mean, all the schs tt r in the picture r the top 10 engineering schs in the US. n i was havin a hard time choosin which one of the top 10 i should go to. doesnt it sound ridiculous? i mean specifically, the schs tt r in question r ranked 5th, 6th and 7th. its like agonizin over which shirt im gonna wear when im gonna wear a jacket over it.

whichever sch i go to, im gonna get pretty much the same standard n quality of education. ultimately, its all down to me to make sure tt i do well. all those stats bt employment n all doesnt matter if i let the stats speak for themselves n not do the work myself. so wat if i hav to go to urbana champaign. its cheaper, i'll b nearer to my family and considerin they need me nearby, its only right as a member of the family tt i should, n besides, its cheaper. n i'll graduate in 4 yrs instead of 5. so wat if its not all glitzy n reputed. it has a reputation of its own.

but the bottom line is, it all doesnt matter til i apply as a transfer student. hell, im not sure if they'll accept me or not yet, so y bother all the talk?

i feel so much better now, knowin that whichever path i take, there is somethin in the offing.

n as weird as it sounds, i went to sleep wit a smile on my face last night. i felt so happy n content all of a sudden. like nothin else mattered.

n i also realized how much that particular event did not affect my mind. had it been serious, i wouldnt not hav been able but to think abt it over n over again. n now tt i realized i wasnt thinkin about it tt much, i know the truth. tt also made me feel better. it truly happened for the better.

n like the last scene in the roswell series, where liz parker (shiri appleby) gets married n hops into the van while the voiceover reads the last section of her diary n goes off to finish tt amazin series, "I'm Liz Parker, and I'm happy." im feelin exactly like that.

its seems to me like im beginnin a whole new start from today onwards.

n u know how cool it is, that for me, the goo goo dolls seem to hav the perfect songs for any mood that i go through. n now tt im feelin happy, the album to listen can only be gutterflower!

"Ecstasy is all you need, livin' in the big machine now, oh, you're so vain..."