man... things r so fucked up right now.

im barely keepin my temper gettin outta hand.

its like im dependin on audioslave n rage against the machine almost all the time like medication, anti-temperament kinda drug.

i kinda understand y its such a need to get rid of my bangladeshi passport as soon as possible. seriously. the embassy's so fucked up. i dont wanna go on, its too much of a torture.

anyway...

except for some incidents, everything else is all well.

friday... met jonas. i asked him if he could pass me his computing n FM notes... i'll need em to study til i wait for uni to begin in september. i mean, computin covers C++ and visual basic, which im learnin anyway, so the notes will help accelerate the learning, i should not hav any probs. as for FM, its juz to make my job easier in uni. i mean MC covers the first yr of my maths relatively well. if FM kinda touches on NUS engineerin maths for freshmen, think about how much more it covers in terms of US engineerin math. boy, if i use the computin n FM notes like A Level prep, i think i will hav a very easy time for the first two years in uni. im excited. no doubt, my grades would b gd then. if i maintain good GPA, then, well, hello ivy league. im gonna transfer to stanford, MIT or princeton for sure.

yea, definately everythin's gd.

ya, so had lunch wit jonas, talkin bt whole lotta stuff. we havent done tt since our days as classmates in queensway. then i was thinkin of meetin jennifer, also formerly of queensway, but she said she wanted to go to ngee ann poly's open house. since i hav quite a number of friends there, i tot i might as well drop by. met sean, lorraine, hazril, kim. went to starbucks later on juz for talk. was quite gd day then.

sat... went to take passport pic for extension, then in the evenin, met junli n junwen for dinner. went to tawseef's place after tt. kinda felt guilty when i found out nabil went to tawseef's place juz to meet me, when he had a party somewhere else. had i known, i would've been there straight away.

sun... meetin classmates, which turned out to b only 5, coz many assumed it was cancelled coz i didnt call em on sat. i was like, huh... if i told em on fri to meet me at 12 at orchard, how can they 'assume' its cancelled. at least they could msg or call me to confirm instead of juz assumin like tt. o well, fortunately the 4 who came was ppl i regularly talk to, if not, on a almost all the time basis, so the lunch was really entertaining. good food, funny stories, u cant ask for more.
thanks zee, sunny, mel n arvin for the gift. u guys really shouldnt hav.

okie, now for the serious discussion.

am i so appealing to guys? lemme correct myself, gays.

two incidents took place in a space of two days.

1. air conditionin ppl came to fix my leakin aircon on sat. i was in my bro's room listenin n watchin music videos tt i downloaded. then, the guy knocks on my door. i presumed they were done n they juz wanted to tell me tt. then the guy goes like he has a huge favour for me. i tot he wanted my help since they were carryin a lot of stuff. then wat he said struck me by surprise. 'erm, can i take a photo of u?' i was like... huh?? supposedly, n i say, supposedly, they think im damn gd lookin n they wanted to show a pic of me to their friend to see what he/she (they didnt say) thought. since ive seen this particular guy come service couple of times, i tot there wouldnt b any danger, told em jus dont spread around to some weird agencies. then they were like, ooh, of cuz not. now tt im thinkin bt it, is tt the reason y he kept comin over to come to my place...?

2. before i had lunch wit my classmates, zee n i walked from orchard mrt to fish n co next to park mall. sunny, mel n arvin were gonna meet us there. when we reached, we found out they werent there yet. so we took a seat. i looked into fish n co n there were couple of guys starin at me. i turned away, thinkin it was juz coincidence. then while i was talkin to zee, i noticed they were still starin at me. i tot it was juz coz i was wearin a newcastle jersey n mayb they hated newcastle or somethin. then, the bunch came out n sat in the outside area. they sat, continued to look at me, but this time smilin. i kinda grew uncomfortable n juz flipped through a copy of TIMES i had. then some muscular guy wearin bright orange shirt was walkin towards em. seems the bunch were waitin for him. then, a surprise. the orange guy walked up to one of the guys sittin n kissed him on the cheek, so casually. then the guy sat down n joined the rest in lookin at me. fortunately the rest came soon n we went in, only to be told to wait while they found a table for 5. then we were waitin inside fish n co, but my classmates also saw tt they were now lookin into the restaurant.

i hav nothin against ppl who r gay. im open to knowin all kinda ppl. juz, im not gay. n pls dont approach me thinkin i would wanna consider them or not. tts juz out of the question.

so im appealin to gays than girls now? boy hav i got a problem. so my friends who told me tt i was pretty wasnt jokin. dammit. this is quite freaky...!